Mar. 4: A new twist on an old favorite.

1971. The Soviet Union has employed a chicken as a spy. Armed with all the high tech spy gear of the early 70's and a clever disguise, the chicken is sent to the United States to uncover American secrets. When he arrives, the chicken's first tactical action is to cross to the other side of Main Street in a small rural town. Why did he do this?

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Yahoo! Answers:

Umm because it was gay IDK!
(Yes, I'm sure the chicken's sexual orientation played a huge part in this decision.)

to test American Jaywalking laws

to get to the other side
(Well, I guess someone had to say it...)

Kernel Sanders was coming down this side
(Apparently to make him into popcorn chicken... HAHA! Get it?... 'Cause he misspelled colonel...)

He yelled from across the farm "He'll ribs him!" as he galloped across the pond!
(Winner of today's "Put Down the Crack Pipe" award.)

to see if the traffic lights really work?

To be discised as a normal chicken
(Oh, come on! I even spelled out 'disguise' in the question! How do you.... GAH!)

because it's a communist chicken. No one knows what their motivation is, they just do things.....
(Dirty Communist poultry...)

There was an incredibly sexy American hen across the street and he just couldn't help himself!

KGB directive---they wanted to know what was on the other side(America)

dude! black ppl arent chickens!!!! thier fried chicken

(Geez, what was I thinking?)

I don't know what you're on about..

well, it seems the Soviet union told the chicken to.
(Clearly you've never seen 'The Hunt for Red October'...)

to get to the other side... he wanted to defect or whatever...
(...but this guy has. Though that appears to be all he has going for him.)

Cuz he's a kiss --- chicken. Can't say no.