Friday, July 31, 2009
Hiatus
Again I'm afraid I have nothing for you. In fact, until further notice, the stupid questions will have to be postponed. If you'll keep checking back when Saturdays roll around, you will eventually find that we're up and running again. Until then, well you'll just have to find something else to waste your time on.
Monday, July 27, 2009
Sorry
I regret to inform you that, due to circumstances out of my control, there will be no stupid questions this week. I may make up for it. I may not. Check back in on Saturday to see.
And now ladies and gentlemen, John West salmon:
And now ladies and gentlemen, John West salmon:
Friday, July 24, 2009
July 25: You are a very hard sleeper.
You wake up one morning to find that you were robbed during the night. Among the missing items, two are extremely problematic: your entire wardrobe (that's every article of clothing you own) and your cell phone (your only telephone). And what you sleep in, well... let's just say going outside could be awkward. Very, very awkward. You live alone. What do you do?
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Yahoo! Answers:
I'd put a towel on and drive to my friend's house.
make clothes out of toilet paper and paper towel =]
(You better hope it's not raining.)
um. grab a towel?
(That's it? Seem's like you'd want to do a little more than that.)
Looks like I have to go all natural.
I would ring every doorbell on my floor, then lay in the middle of the floor... See what happens then.
free ball it to town and go shopping!!
Go outside in a blanket, and walk to my best friends house, because I can do that.
And take her clothes. Provided they fit, which I doubt.
Make a toga from a sheet and go grab some clothes from my neighbors.
i go file a police report...i sleep naked so i suppose ill just grab my shower curtain and wrap that around me for the time being.
(Shower curtain... interesting choice. I don't know that the police station would be my first stop when wearing my bathroom.)
call a friend and ask to borrow clothes,file a police report. take a shower, then go shopping for new clothes and a cell phone
(OK, you even said you'd go get a new phone (clearly indicated to be your only one), and yet you still plan to call someone. I'm going to pretend you planned on using skype or something like that so my faith in the human race doesn't sink any lower.)
erm.... I would take a towel or blanket or something and go to my neighbors, that i trust.
hahahah
(That's a good call not going to your neighbors who you don't trust. Solid decision making on display right here.)
Find something in the house and make temporary clothing out of it.
Wrap myself up in a towel go to the thrift shop and buy me some cheap clothes to wear for the day, then find the mother ****** who took my **** and cut [various parts of the male or female anatomy] off >.
order clothes on jcpenny.com and have clothes shiped and stay inside til they come
(Not exactly efficient, but a good idea. Hope you didn't have anywhere to go for 2-3 business days.)
i'd pull out my sewing machine, stip my bed of it's sheets, then make myself a dress. then i'd drive to the police station and find my clothes!
(Now that's doing this thing right.)
go next door in a blanket, use the phone THERE, then maybe call a couple of friends to pick you up. then kill the robber. how embarrassing.
(Call a couple of friends to pick you up? I don't get it, you just walked next door...)
I'd be really happy because then I i could get new clothes. I would try to cover myself with a blanket and walk to my neighbors house or the nearest pay-phone.Caught you now, didn't I?
make kind of like an Indian sarong out of a sheet or a towel and put a bindy on my head and go shopping ;D
Make breakfast. Get some coffee in me, and walk to the neighbors in a towel. Ask to borrow the phone after a humorous exchange about what happened, and then see if I can borrow some clothes, and go buy some new ones. That would be funny... unless it really happened. lol
(Good to see you aren't too worked up about it.)
Check the security cameras to plot revenge on the culprit. Then email a friend and explain what happened and ask him to bring me some clothes.. then I would go to a store and buy more clothes, after that its all revenge planning....
ski mask.. check
latex gloves.. check..
poncho.. check...
lime.. check..
plastic bags.. check..
shovel.. check..
full magazine.. check..
knock to the neighbors wall, ask for clothes.
(That would be an interesting conversation to have through a wall. Especially if you didn't live in an apartment.)
Well i would email my friend to bring me clothes cause you never said that they stole my laptop.
(I did not. A small oversight on my part.)
First id b very angry, then i would walk to neighbors house and ask for help....
(Unless you missed a step somewhere in there, you and your neighbors are quite close...)
Order one pair of clothes online and have them shipped OVERNIGHT....
Eaaaaasy!
1- Make sure to make a Police Case, and report Excessive Prices on 'each item' stolen.
2- Call the Homeowners insurance with the police case number on record. There will be a deductible, but it will be covered with the 'excessive amounts".
3- Yiiiippeeeee! Go shopping for an all new wardrobe with the insurance money!
4- Save some money to change all locks in the house, and in your bedroom.
5- Never, but 'ever', lose 'the devastating' look on you... of course, because of the great trauma you just went through...
(6 - Get convicted of insurance fraud.)
Email mys friends and have them pick something up 4 me
i...
would be naked
(Possibly, yes.)
Take some of sister's
(What part of 'you live alone' did you not understand?)
ummm be naked idk
call a friend and tell him to bring some extra clothes over so you can change into them.then if you have some money then shop til you drop make sure if you have style or want to change your wardrobe this is the time to do it.
(You - have - no - phone. Pay attention!)
Put on my girlfriends mini skirt and walk out. With my hair even being a guy i probably look pretty hot
(I will ignore the apparent contradictions presented by your girlfriend's skirt being available to you, as the mental pictures you have forced into my head are both distracting and disturbing.)
Don't go outside unless to pick leaves. That's what Adam & Eve used.
Be naked! That's what GO D would've wanted!
use a towel or a blanket
duhhh!!
haaha
That's actually an interesting question! I guess I would throw lots of blankets on around me to cover my parts that need to be covered and run to my neighbors house to use THEIR phone or borrow clothes.
Just thinking seriously.
(Thank you for explaining the purpose of the blankets. We were all very confused.)
gladwrap anyone?
i wear my bed sheet . cut a big hole in its center and put my head in and wear it as a caftan.
(I'm very impressed with the creative outfits people are forming out of bed sheets.)
Assuming that my computer was also stolen, and that there was no way to contact outside help electronically, I would take a sheet off my bed and wrap myself with it, and then go to to the nearest neighbor's house to call the police and also to arrange for clothing to be brought to me, while perhaps borrowing some from the neighbor.
It is also possible that someone would eventually come over, perhaps the mailman, and I could then get help through them.
(Get help through the mailman, huh? Hopefully you're a little more tactful than this...)
wait till the mail man came knock him out take his clothes his phone and his wallet max out his credit card buying clothes a phone a new computer and eat some breakfast then come back home find out where the mailman lives drop him off then when he wakes up hell think it was a dream
(One minute he's at work, next minute he's lying on a his front porch stark naked with a lump on his noggin. That's one crazy dream.)
(Administrative Comment: I briefly contemplated trying to find a way to eliminate the possibility of coverage. But that would have made the question way too long. And I'm not sure how the bed sheet would be stolen.)
(Administrative Comment #2: Perhaps it is the creativity drought I've been in lately with these questions, but I think this is easily the best one we've seen in a while. Don't get used to it.)
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Yahoo! Answers:
I'd put a towel on and drive to my friend's house.
make clothes out of toilet paper and paper towel =]
(You better hope it's not raining.)
um. grab a towel?
(That's it? Seem's like you'd want to do a little more than that.)
Looks like I have to go all natural.
I would ring every doorbell on my floor, then lay in the middle of the floor... See what happens then.
free ball it to town and go shopping!!
Go outside in a blanket, and walk to my best friends house, because I can do that.
And take her clothes. Provided they fit, which I doubt.
Make a toga from a sheet and go grab some clothes from my neighbors.
i go file a police report...i sleep naked so i suppose ill just grab my shower curtain and wrap that around me for the time being.
(Shower curtain... interesting choice. I don't know that the police station would be my first stop when wearing my bathroom.)
call a friend and ask to borrow clothes,file a police report. take a shower, then go shopping for new clothes and a cell phone
(OK, you even said you'd go get a new phone (clearly indicated to be your only one), and yet you still plan to call someone. I'm going to pretend you planned on using skype or something like that so my faith in the human race doesn't sink any lower.)
erm.... I would take a towel or blanket or something and go to my neighbors, that i trust.
hahahah
(That's a good call not going to your neighbors who you don't trust. Solid decision making on display right here.)
Find something in the house and make temporary clothing out of it.
Wrap myself up in a towel go to the thrift shop and buy me some cheap clothes to wear for the day, then find the mother ****** who took my **** and cut [various parts of the male or female anatomy] off >.
order clothes on jcpenny.com and have clothes shiped and stay inside til they come
(Not exactly efficient, but a good idea. Hope you didn't have anywhere to go for 2-3 business days.)
i'd pull out my sewing machine, stip my bed of it's sheets, then make myself a dress. then i'd drive to the police station and find my clothes!
(Now that's doing this thing right.)
go next door in a blanket, use the phone THERE, then maybe call a couple of friends to pick you up. then kill the robber. how embarrassing.
(Call a couple of friends to pick you up? I don't get it, you just walked next door...)
I'd be really happy because then I i could get new clothes. I would try to cover myself with a blanket and walk to my neighbors house or the nearest pay-phone.Caught you now, didn't I?
make kind of like an Indian sarong out of a sheet or a towel and put a bindy on my head and go shopping ;D
Make breakfast. Get some coffee in me, and walk to the neighbors in a towel. Ask to borrow the phone after a humorous exchange about what happened, and then see if I can borrow some clothes, and go buy some new ones. That would be funny... unless it really happened. lol
(Good to see you aren't too worked up about it.)
Check the security cameras to plot revenge on the culprit. Then email a friend and explain what happened and ask him to bring me some clothes.. then I would go to a store and buy more clothes, after that its all revenge planning....
ski mask.. check
latex gloves.. check..
poncho.. check...
lime.. check..
plastic bags.. check..
shovel.. check..
full magazine.. check..
knock to the neighbors wall, ask for clothes.
(That would be an interesting conversation to have through a wall. Especially if you didn't live in an apartment.)
Well i would email my friend to bring me clothes cause you never said that they stole my laptop.
(I did not. A small oversight on my part.)
First id b very angry, then i would walk to neighbors house and ask for help....
(Unless you missed a step somewhere in there, you and your neighbors are quite close...)
Order one pair of clothes online and have them shipped OVERNIGHT....
Eaaaaasy!
1- Make sure to make a Police Case, and report Excessive Prices on 'each item' stolen.
2- Call the Homeowners insurance with the police case number on record. There will be a deductible, but it will be covered with the 'excessive amounts".
3- Yiiiippeeeee! Go shopping for an all new wardrobe with the insurance money!
4- Save some money to change all locks in the house, and in your bedroom.
5- Never, but 'ever', lose 'the devastating' look on you... of course, because of the great trauma you just went through...
(6 - Get convicted of insurance fraud.)
Email mys friends and have them pick something up 4 me
i...
would be naked
(Possibly, yes.)
Take some of sister's
(What part of 'you live alone' did you not understand?)
ummm be naked idk
call a friend and tell him to bring some extra clothes over so you can change into them.then if you have some money then shop til you drop make sure if you have style or want to change your wardrobe this is the time to do it.
(You - have - no - phone. Pay attention!)
Put on my girlfriends mini skirt and walk out. With my hair even being a guy i probably look pretty hot
(I will ignore the apparent contradictions presented by your girlfriend's skirt being available to you, as the mental pictures you have forced into my head are both distracting and disturbing.)
Don't go outside unless to pick leaves. That's what Adam & Eve used.
Be naked! That's what GO D would've wanted!
use a towel or a blanket
duhhh!!
haaha
That's actually an interesting question! I guess I would throw lots of blankets on around me to cover my parts that need to be covered and run to my neighbors house to use THEIR phone or borrow clothes.
Just thinking seriously.
(Thank you for explaining the purpose of the blankets. We were all very confused.)
gladwrap anyone?
i wear my bed sheet . cut a big hole in its center and put my head in and wear it as a caftan.
(I'm very impressed with the creative outfits people are forming out of bed sheets.)
Assuming that my computer was also stolen, and that there was no way to contact outside help electronically, I would take a sheet off my bed and wrap myself with it, and then go to to the nearest neighbor's house to call the police and also to arrange for clothing to be brought to me, while perhaps borrowing some from the neighbor.
It is also possible that someone would eventually come over, perhaps the mailman, and I could then get help through them.
(Get help through the mailman, huh? Hopefully you're a little more tactful than this...)
wait till the mail man came knock him out take his clothes his phone and his wallet max out his credit card buying clothes a phone a new computer and eat some breakfast then come back home find out where the mailman lives drop him off then when he wakes up hell think it was a dream
(One minute he's at work, next minute he's lying on a his front porch stark naked with a lump on his noggin. That's one crazy dream.)
(Administrative Comment: I briefly contemplated trying to find a way to eliminate the possibility of coverage. But that would have made the question way too long. And I'm not sure how the bed sheet would be stolen.)
(Administrative Comment #2: Perhaps it is the creativity drought I've been in lately with these questions, but I think this is easily the best one we've seen in a while. Don't get used to it.)
Wednesday, July 22, 2009
July 23: There are parts of this question that seem awfully familiar...
You're walking down the street when a stranger offers you some cheesecake from his coat pocket. You are tempted, but refuse due to your religous beliefs. The stranger gets really offended and starts chasing you with an axe. The ordeal turns into a Jason Bourne style rooftop to rooftop chase and after one particularly long jump you break your leg. The axe murderer is close. You have two hopes of survival and do some quick math. If you try to get up and run you have a 10% chance of survival, but this will be excruciatingly painful due to your affliction. Permanent damage is likely. If you stay and attempt to fight back without moving, your chances are 7.3%. What do you do?
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Yahoo! Answers:
I would just stand there and allow him/her to kill me...... However i would request that he/she made my death extra slow and painful!
(Well that doesn't make much sense. But then, when do we ever expect otherwise here?)
i will say sorry and ask the stranger for the cheese cake. there will be 50% of survival chance. he may kill me 50% chance. or give the cake and leave me alone another 50%. and i will eat it. and ask God to forgive me [if I shouldn't have eaten it for religious beliefs. God will forgive at this crucial moment].
I'd stay and fight back because he is mentally deranged!
I'd make sure I am on the edge of the roof and when he jumps onto my roof I would stop him from landing then he falls to his death! Or if he was on the same roof as me I'd edge him over to the side of the roof, then duck down when he swings the axe so he looses his balance and falls off the roof to his death!
There is no escape for the axe murderer if he is trying to kill me! lol!
(None of those things were options.)
I'll say,"I love cheesecakes, really." or I'll kick him in the groin and shove the axe in his ***.
(Um... ouch.)
desert lent
can't get it exactly
(It took me forever to figure this one out. I kept looking at that going, "What does the desert have to do with anything?" I mean, people make some pretty big topical leaps in their answers, but usually there is some noticeable connection. And then I realized: "Oh... He meant dessert!" I should have known from his second line there that something like that had happened.)
axe him to stop >> lol
(I really hope he kills you.)
Umm let's see...
I see a stranger trying to offer me something. Run.
Problem solved.
(But you see, you've already refused. That stuff I described wasn't theoretical. It already happened. So unless you have a time machine, you better think of something quick.)
wheres the other choices? you mean i cant talk my way out of it. Geeze, i guess i would run.
(No. Talking doesn't work. Axe murderers are very irrational people. Especially when they possess cheesecake.)
I would just eat the damn cheesecake and then go antiquing with him.
(Your mother never taught you not to go antiquing with strangers?)
run at lest i'll be alive to see another day even if i cant walk
(That's not what the odds say.)
call the police or shoot him with my gun or eat his cheese cake
(If you had a gun, don't you think I would have mentioned it? I mean, that would make things a lot easier.)
i take the damn cheesecake then pretend to eat it but when he walsk away i put it in my pocket unti i find a trashcan
I would probably stick and fight since im pretty strong so it will probably raise my chances of beating him by atleast.. o lets see 22.3547% according to my calculations. And I wouldnt have to deal with the excruciatinging pain from running.
(Your calculation's off. You forgot to account for the fact that your leg is broken, so the decimal point is in the wrong place. It's .223547%. It is in these critical times when you will regret ever asking the question "When am I ever going to use this crap?" Kids, stay in school.)
eat the cheesecake
(God is going to strike you cheesecake-eating fools down.)
Wake up. It's only a dream?
(I'm getting real tired of this answer.)
Yikes ! Someone already gave the answer, although I would have said:
EAT THE CHEESECAKE, POCKET LINT AND ALL
(That is both blasphemous and unsanitary.)
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Yahoo! Answers:
I would just stand there and allow him/her to kill me...... However i would request that he/she made my death extra slow and painful!
(Well that doesn't make much sense. But then, when do we ever expect otherwise here?)
i will say sorry and ask the stranger for the cheese cake. there will be 50% of survival chance. he may kill me 50% chance. or give the cake and leave me alone another 50%. and i will eat it. and ask God to forgive me [if I shouldn't have eaten it for religious beliefs. God will forgive at this crucial moment].
I'd stay and fight back because he is mentally deranged!
I'd make sure I am on the edge of the roof and when he jumps onto my roof I would stop him from landing then he falls to his death! Or if he was on the same roof as me I'd edge him over to the side of the roof, then duck down when he swings the axe so he looses his balance and falls off the roof to his death!
There is no escape for the axe murderer if he is trying to kill me! lol!
(None of those things were options.)
I'll say,"I love cheesecakes, really." or I'll kick him in the groin and shove the axe in his ***.
(Um... ouch.)
desert lent
can't get it exactly
(It took me forever to figure this one out. I kept looking at that going, "What does the desert have to do with anything?" I mean, people make some pretty big topical leaps in their answers, but usually there is some noticeable connection. And then I realized: "Oh... He meant dessert!" I should have known from his second line there that something like that had happened.)
axe him to stop >> lol
(I really hope he kills you.)
Umm let's see...
I see a stranger trying to offer me something. Run.
Problem solved.
(But you see, you've already refused. That stuff I described wasn't theoretical. It already happened. So unless you have a time machine, you better think of something quick.)
wheres the other choices? you mean i cant talk my way out of it. Geeze, i guess i would run.
(No. Talking doesn't work. Axe murderers are very irrational people. Especially when they possess cheesecake.)
I would just eat the damn cheesecake and then go antiquing with him.
(Your mother never taught you not to go antiquing with strangers?)
run at lest i'll be alive to see another day even if i cant walk
(That's not what the odds say.)
call the police or shoot him with my gun or eat his cheese cake
(If you had a gun, don't you think I would have mentioned it? I mean, that would make things a lot easier.)
i take the damn cheesecake then pretend to eat it but when he walsk away i put it in my pocket unti i find a trashcan
I would probably stick and fight since im pretty strong so it will probably raise my chances of beating him by atleast.. o lets see 22.3547% according to my calculations. And I wouldnt have to deal with the excruciatinging pain from running.
(Your calculation's off. You forgot to account for the fact that your leg is broken, so the decimal point is in the wrong place. It's .223547%. It is in these critical times when you will regret ever asking the question "When am I ever going to use this crap?" Kids, stay in school.)
eat the cheesecake
(God is going to strike you cheesecake-eating fools down.)
Wake up. It's only a dream?
(I'm getting real tired of this answer.)
Yikes ! Someone already gave the answer, although I would have said:
EAT THE CHEESECAKE, POCKET LINT AND ALL
(That is both blasphemous and unsanitary.)
Monday, July 20, 2009
Don't ask me why the crocodile's there. I don't know.
You are the newest jester in the king's court. It's not really a position you wanted, but through a combination of too much credit card debt and some bad luck, here you are. Here's the problem: the king wants to laugh, but he's tired of the standard joke teller. The last guy was a stand-up jester and he was fed to a wild boar. So you have to take a different approach, but you haven't decided what it would be when you find yourself in front of the king. Looking around you see a deck of cards, a blow dryer, and an untrained crocodile on a leash. You don't have to use these things, but they are there. How do you make the king laugh and escape a horrible death?
---------------------------------------------------------------------
Yahoo! Answers:
[The first answer is the guy who posted the Potter Puppet Pals link. I know, I said you wouldn't see this question, but I had a change of heart brought on mainly by a lack of creativity and the desire to go to bed.]
Point a gun to his head and say "Laugh you sonofa----- or else I'll fa king shoot!"
(I almost didn't even include this one, but his clever use of the word 'king' was too good to pass up.)
[Do something obscene] and dance.
(I don't think you want to know what it was.)
I have no idea.
(You are a waste of precious oxygen.)
i will i think use all these things. i will blow the cards one by one into the crocodile's mouth, with a bad aim at it . the king will laugh seeing the crocodile running after each card and missing some and eating some. i will also make it a game of it by asking the courtiers to count how many cards went into the crocodile's mouth. i hope the king will laugh at this
(Wild boar attack!)
Haha hop into the croc's mouth! its a lot better then the 'horrible death' the king would bring to me right? and the king would either save me or watch and either way he laughs!
Everyone enjoys my pain.
*sweating*
Knock knock
*kings bored voice*: Whos there?
Lettuce
king: lettuce who (*bored voice*)
Lettuce in, were cold out h-here...he he ha ha ha ha!
...
ARGHGHHA! OMG! THE PAIN! ARGH! THE PPAAAINN!
(I'm glad you've accepted your fate.)
i would blow the dryer in the croc's face, to make him blind.... then, i would make him pick a card.
Throw The Blow Dryer At The Crocodile Really Hard Then Throw The Cards Above My Head So They Go Everywhere And Laugh. XD
(Why Do You Feel The Need To Capitalize Every Word?)
Crap I'm no joker so I'd probably get fed to the gator!
(You get fed to the boar. Geez... pay attention.)
I'd fight the crocodile like in this fight scene.
(That was one of the most incredible things I've ever seen.)
Feed someone to the croc and say "crikey, he's a hungry lil bugger!"
is the king ticklish?
---------------------------------------------------------------------
Yahoo! Answers:
[The first answer is the guy who posted the Potter Puppet Pals link. I know, I said you wouldn't see this question, but I had a change of heart brought on mainly by a lack of creativity and the desire to go to bed.]
Point a gun to his head and say "Laugh you sonofa----- or else I'll fa king shoot!"
(I almost didn't even include this one, but his clever use of the word 'king' was too good to pass up.)
[Do something obscene] and dance.
(I don't think you want to know what it was.)
I have no idea.
(You are a waste of precious oxygen.)
i will i think use all these things. i will blow the cards one by one into the crocodile's mouth, with a bad aim at it . the king will laugh seeing the crocodile running after each card and missing some and eating some. i will also make it a game of it by asking the courtiers to count how many cards went into the crocodile's mouth. i hope the king will laugh at this
(Wild boar attack!)
Haha hop into the croc's mouth! its a lot better then the 'horrible death' the king would bring to me right? and the king would either save me or watch and either way he laughs!
Everyone enjoys my pain.
*sweating*
Knock knock
*kings bored voice*: Whos there?
Lettuce
king: lettuce who (*bored voice*)
Lettuce in, were cold out h-here...he he ha ha ha ha!
...
ARGHGHHA! OMG! THE PAIN! ARGH! THE PPAAAINN!
(I'm glad you've accepted your fate.)
i would blow the dryer in the croc's face, to make him blind.... then, i would make him pick a card.
Throw The Blow Dryer At The Crocodile Really Hard Then Throw The Cards Above My Head So They Go Everywhere And Laugh. XD
(Why Do You Feel The Need To Capitalize Every Word?)
Crap I'm no joker so I'd probably get fed to the gator!
(You get fed to the boar. Geez... pay attention.)
I'd fight the crocodile like in this fight scene.
(That was one of the most incredible things I've ever seen.)
Feed someone to the croc and say "crikey, he's a hungry lil bugger!"
is the king ticklish?
Friday, July 17, 2009
July 18: For a site that so many people visit, this sure does happen to me a lot...
Well, I logged onto Yahoo and put up a couple questions, and not two minutes later did the blasted thing go down. Which of course means that I can't do a whole lot today. However, before YA crashed on me, one guy submitted an answer to the question (which you'll probably never see as it was pretty lame). This answer provided me with something to show you to keep you a step under mildly entertained. There's like a 99% chance that you've seen these before, but I'm afraid it's all I've got. I laugh every time I see these, so maybe you can find the same joy in them.
Wednesday, July 15, 2009
July 16: Serves you right for stealing the hat from that snowman you jerk.
You are a magician in the middle of a show and you've come to the part where you pull a rabbit out of your hat. You've done this a thousand times, so you've gotten a little careless as time has gone on, and this time you pull out a rhino by accident. The rhino isn't happy about being stuffed into that tiny hat, so he's looking for blood. You must protect yourself and your audience (liability issues), but all you have to defend yourself are your feeble magic tricks. How do you subdue the rhino?
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Yahoo! Answers:
With your own strength you push the rhino back into the hat
(Now that would be a crowd pleaser. You don't see that one too often.)
use ecko unlimited sneakers! XD
(Ha, that's not as clever as you think it is.)
you hypnotize the rhino into falling asleep.
This has got to be the strangest question I've ever read on here. And that's saying a lot.
(Why, thank you. And I didn't even have any inspiration for it. Just sat down and made it up. Pretty good, huh?)
run.....run as fast as two legs could
Turn it into a cute kitten!!!!and try not tyo look scared
Interesting... point at the crowd and say 'EAT THEM!' Then vanish in a puff of smoke! It works for everyone
(Until the fuzz hunt you down. You can't get out of setting a rhino on hundreds of people.)
Im not sure ,confusing question .
Vot me for best answer please .
(I won't be votting you for anything. You didn't even answer the question, which wasn't that confusing by the way. I don't see what's so strange about accidentally producing an angry rhinoceros out of nowhere. These are the kinds of things you need to be prepared for.)
I would spontaneously combust. And hope that everyone does the same....its the only way.
(Make sure you have your nose spray handy!
http://onecuriousyahoo.blogspot.com/2009/02/nasal-sprayspontaneous-combustion.html)
I agree with buster [the guy that said this was the strangest question he'd ever seen] but I would use some invisibility trick maybe :)
(Won't work. You're overlooking the little known fact that rhinos can smell fear.)
do the disappearing act on the rhino. bet it'll be surprised to find itself charging at some sand dune in the Sahara desert!
It's easier to disappear yourself. Why tempt fate?
saw him in half
(You better hope there's not a PETA rep in the audience.)
(Administrative... Um, I Don't Know What You'd Call This: I leave you today with a little taste of what I will be doing this evening. Just thought I'd share. Rock on.)
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Yahoo! Answers:
With your own strength you push the rhino back into the hat
(Now that would be a crowd pleaser. You don't see that one too often.)
use ecko unlimited sneakers! XD
(Ha, that's not as clever as you think it is.)
you hypnotize the rhino into falling asleep.
This has got to be the strangest question I've ever read on here. And that's saying a lot.
(Why, thank you. And I didn't even have any inspiration for it. Just sat down and made it up. Pretty good, huh?)
run.....run as fast as two legs could
Turn it into a cute kitten!!!!and try not tyo look scared
Interesting... point at the crowd and say 'EAT THEM!' Then vanish in a puff of smoke! It works for everyone
(Until the fuzz hunt you down. You can't get out of setting a rhino on hundreds of people.)
Im not sure ,confusing question .
Vot me for best answer please .
(I won't be votting you for anything. You didn't even answer the question, which wasn't that confusing by the way. I don't see what's so strange about accidentally producing an angry rhinoceros out of nowhere. These are the kinds of things you need to be prepared for.)
I would spontaneously combust. And hope that everyone does the same....its the only way.
(Make sure you have your nose spray handy!
http://onecuriousyahoo.blogspot.com/2009/02/nasal-sprayspontaneous-combustion.html)
I agree with buster [the guy that said this was the strangest question he'd ever seen] but I would use some invisibility trick maybe :)
(Won't work. You're overlooking the little known fact that rhinos can smell fear.)
do the disappearing act on the rhino. bet it'll be surprised to find itself charging at some sand dune in the Sahara desert!
It's easier to disappear yourself. Why tempt fate?
saw him in half
(You better hope there's not a PETA rep in the audience.)
(Administrative... Um, I Don't Know What You'd Call This: I leave you today with a little taste of what I will be doing this evening. Just thought I'd share. Rock on.)
Monday, July 13, 2009
July 14: I would rather not know how this one got started.
What is your overall opinion of the congratulatory bum slap?
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Yahoo! Answers:
Hate it.
i have never been a fan of the congratulatory bum slap.
if it were up to me, i would put an end it.
(Put an END to it... Haha! Good one.)
It's only acceptable on the baseball diamond
what ever happened to a high five or one of those "jump into the air and hit my stomach with another persons stomach" type things.
Is the bum slap really necessary?
(Don't forget the fist bump. And, by the way, you are referring to the chest bump I believe. Chest bump. Not stomach bump. That would be both awkward and relatively painful.)
It has been abused too many times by the old creepy coach who married a manly looking woman just so he could say that he dont like it the other way.
(This doesn't make any sense, and yet I'm still disgusted. Odd...)
Haha, me and my friends used to do that in high school and say "good game, good hustle", even when there was no game and/or hustle to be had. We used to joke that it wasn't gay if you said that(of course, we all understand it never has to be gay. any same sex interaction could be construed as gay, thats all in intention. But we had a good laugh anyways.) All and all, id have to say its a bit silly.
(You didn't have many friends, did you?)
i think it's just an excuse for guys in tight pants to touch each other inappropriately and not be gay.
men slapping men on the bum...hmmmm...WRONG!
Always a little weird, especially on the baseball diamond. But my feelings are: open handed slap, ok. Any cupping of the hand, mr. face meet mr. dirt.
(Also, there must be no lingering. There's a fine line between celebratory bum slap and assault.)
eeeww
(Yeah, pretty much.)
people who like to slap butts?

Hahahahah
pervy second uncles, sweaty bosses, cocky boys...
DOWN WITH THE BUM SLAP
It's good for morale.
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Yahoo! Answers:
Hate it.
i have never been a fan of the congratulatory bum slap.
if it were up to me, i would put an end it.
(Put an END to it... Haha! Good one.)
It's only acceptable on the baseball diamond
what ever happened to a high five or one of those "jump into the air and hit my stomach with another persons stomach" type things.
Is the bum slap really necessary?
(Don't forget the fist bump. And, by the way, you are referring to the chest bump I believe. Chest bump. Not stomach bump. That would be both awkward and relatively painful.)
It has been abused too many times by the old creepy coach who married a manly looking woman just so he could say that he dont like it the other way.
(This doesn't make any sense, and yet I'm still disgusted. Odd...)
Haha, me and my friends used to do that in high school and say "good game, good hustle", even when there was no game and/or hustle to be had. We used to joke that it wasn't gay if you said that(of course, we all understand it never has to be gay. any same sex interaction could be construed as gay, thats all in intention. But we had a good laugh anyways.) All and all, id have to say its a bit silly.
(You didn't have many friends, did you?)
i think it's just an excuse for guys in tight pants to touch each other inappropriately and not be gay.
men slapping men on the bum...hmmmm...WRONG!
Always a little weird, especially on the baseball diamond. But my feelings are: open handed slap, ok. Any cupping of the hand, mr. face meet mr. dirt.
(Also, there must be no lingering. There's a fine line between celebratory bum slap and assault.)
eeeww
(Yeah, pretty much.)
people who like to slap butts?

Hahahahah
pervy second uncles, sweaty bosses, cocky boys...
DOWN WITH THE BUM SLAP
It's good for morale.
Thursday, July 9, 2009
July 10: The best part about this question is that it wasn't possible for me to offend anyone.
You have been abducted by a gaggle of Amish people. Why? I think only you know that. Whatever you did it must have been bad, because you now find yourself wrapped completely in duct tape and suspended from a barn ceiling by your toes with nothing below you but hay and cow manure. And one cow. How do you escape this fiendish Amish trap?
------------------------------------------------------------------
Yahoo! Answers:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WrowbOGZJwg
(This really isn't relevant as far as answering the question, but if you haven't seen this you should definitely check it out.)
Amish... duct tape... you must be dreaming... wake up and it'll all be over.
turn a flashlight on they scatter light cockroaches
let your toes rip off then fall into the manure then wiggle and eat your way out
(Eat your way out? That's disgusting.)
I would just relax.. Hey there Amish not Mujahideen........
Run faster than a horse-drawn carriage.
(That's going to be difficult as a duct tape mummy.)
Walk away.
The duck tape flew away. (Amish people don't use duct tape.)
(You should know by now that I like a bad joke as much as the next guy... But this is below even my level of tolerance.)
By exiting out of this site?
Moo.
(I'm sorry. For whatever reason, I felt that I had to do that.)
why? are you in it cause that would be kinda awesome.
i would teleport myself to the outside of the barn, (because i have super powers and you don't)
(I actually am. I didn't have a flashlight like the other guy suggested so I figured I'd give the laptop a shot. It's not working. And I'm starting to get a little light headed.)
Pretend to be possessed to scare them away.
Wriggle around to become sweaty and to loosen the duct-tape to eventually free yourself, fall into the hay, and run away.
Well, I Amish people dont have duct tape, so I cant answer that
(Actually, you could have, you just chose not to.)
(Administrative Comment: I'm certainly no expert on the Amish, so I don't know if they can use duct tape or not. But if they can't, what a sad life they lead...)
(Important Administrative Comment: I've had a slight change of heart. Instead of Monday, Wednesday, Friday, posts will appear Tuesday, Thursday, Saturday until normal format is resumed. But not this Saturday.)
------------------------------------------------------------------
Yahoo! Answers:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WrowbOGZJwg
(This really isn't relevant as far as answering the question, but if you haven't seen this you should definitely check it out.)
Amish... duct tape... you must be dreaming... wake up and it'll all be over.
turn a flashlight on they scatter light cockroaches
let your toes rip off then fall into the manure then wiggle and eat your way out
(Eat your way out? That's disgusting.)
I would just relax.. Hey there Amish not Mujahideen........
Run faster than a horse-drawn carriage.
(That's going to be difficult as a duct tape mummy.)
Walk away.
The duck tape flew away. (Amish people don't use duct tape.)
(You should know by now that I like a bad joke as much as the next guy... But this is below even my level of tolerance.)
By exiting out of this site?
Moo.
(I'm sorry. For whatever reason, I felt that I had to do that.)
why? are you in it cause that would be kinda awesome.
i would teleport myself to the outside of the barn, (because i have super powers and you don't)
(I actually am. I didn't have a flashlight like the other guy suggested so I figured I'd give the laptop a shot. It's not working. And I'm starting to get a little light headed.)
Pretend to be possessed to scare them away.
Wriggle around to become sweaty and to loosen the duct-tape to eventually free yourself, fall into the hay, and run away.
Well, I Amish people dont have duct tape, so I cant answer that
(Actually, you could have, you just chose not to.)
(Administrative Comment: I'm certainly no expert on the Amish, so I don't know if they can use duct tape or not. But if they can't, what a sad life they lead...)
(Important Administrative Comment: I've had a slight change of heart. Instead of Monday, Wednesday, Friday, posts will appear Tuesday, Thursday, Saturday until normal format is resumed. But not this Saturday.)
Tuesday, July 7, 2009
July 8: Please don't be too upset. I can't handle the guilt.
Dear faithful OCY masses,
SQotD is about to undergo a slight format change that you may not like all that much. You see, as we have surpassed 100 posts, it's become harder and harder to come up with fresh ideas and the overall quality, if we're being totally honest with ourselves, has decreased somewhat. Therefore, I have made the executive decision to go to a Monday, Wednesday, Friday format. That should take some of the creative pressure off while still maintaining a three question per week pace.
Now, I could make all kinds of excuses for having to go to this format. And I think I will:
- The economy's terrible and I can't afford to hire any more staff. And don't tell them I said this, but the people I have now... well, they aren't exactly giving 100%. They keep grumbling about wanting to be paid.
- I'm afraid exposing so much stupidity may provoke North Korea to nuke us. You know, national security and all that.
- To help the environment. And if you're wondering how this helps the environment, you can save both of us a lot of frustration and just let it go.
- I need more time to ward off the impending super-intelligent hamster attack.
- I have been recruited by the CIA to perform covert operations in Sweden on Tuesdays and Thursdays. I'd tell you more, but then I would have to kill you, and then you wouldn't get to see any more questions. So you'll keep your mouth shut if you know what's good for you.
- While its connection to typing is fuzzy at best, I secretly fear carpal tunnel syndrome.
So as you can see, my hands are tied. Now, this is by no means a permanent change. I expect to return to the weekday format sometime in early September, when I will be in a much better situation to be inspired. It may even go back before that. Who knows? But anyway, I'm sorry if this news proves to be devastating to you.
See you Friday.
Or, as the Swedes say:
Vi ses på fredag.
Watch CBS News Videos Online
SQotD is about to undergo a slight format change that you may not like all that much. You see, as we have surpassed 100 posts, it's become harder and harder to come up with fresh ideas and the overall quality, if we're being totally honest with ourselves, has decreased somewhat. Therefore, I have made the executive decision to go to a Monday, Wednesday, Friday format. That should take some of the creative pressure off while still maintaining a three question per week pace.
Now, I could make all kinds of excuses for having to go to this format. And I think I will:
- The economy's terrible and I can't afford to hire any more staff. And don't tell them I said this, but the people I have now... well, they aren't exactly giving 100%. They keep grumbling about wanting to be paid.
- I'm afraid exposing so much stupidity may provoke North Korea to nuke us. You know, national security and all that.
- To help the environment. And if you're wondering how this helps the environment, you can save both of us a lot of frustration and just let it go.
- I need more time to ward off the impending super-intelligent hamster attack.
- I have been recruited by the CIA to perform covert operations in Sweden on Tuesdays and Thursdays. I'd tell you more, but then I would have to kill you, and then you wouldn't get to see any more questions. So you'll keep your mouth shut if you know what's good for you.
- While its connection to typing is fuzzy at best, I secretly fear carpal tunnel syndrome.
So as you can see, my hands are tied. Now, this is by no means a permanent change. I expect to return to the weekday format sometime in early September, when I will be in a much better situation to be inspired. It may even go back before that. Who knows? But anyway, I'm sorry if this news proves to be devastating to you.
See you Friday.
Or, as the Swedes say:
Vi ses på fredag.
Watch CBS News Videos Online
Monday, July 6, 2009
July 7: It's another Rejected Question Day! Hooray!
It's been a while since I've given you the pleasure of experiencing some of the sub par questions I've posted onto Answers. I know you secretly like these, and find the low quality and/or poor responses inexplicably entertaining, so we'll go ahead and have a look at some recent rejected questions.
*********************************************************
Question # 1 (You have to make a living somehow...)
You've been laid off and are desperately seeking employment. After much searching, you realize your options are pretty limited, and settle on the only thing available that fits your particular set of skills: professional wrestler. What is your wrestler name and what does your costume look like?
------------------------------------------------------------------
Yahoo! Answers
haha good question but im not creative :)
(I posted this twice and this was the only response I got the first time. I'd say it was a waste of my time, but that's pretty much the essence of this whole experiment.)
Mr. Italiano
I would have a cape that looks like the Italian flag. And My Green suit would have a Italian Style tie with a red and white shorts.
The black Axe
and my costume wld b a pair of ED Hardy Jeans wit a axe and blood spray painted
im not a fan of tight pants
************************************************************
Question # 2 (I still had Batman on the brain.)
What would you carry in a your utility belt?
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Yahoo! Answers:
I think so
(Good work. I mean, really, you've gotta love when they put so much thought into it.)
Duct tape, a can of Scrubby Bubbles and an acetylene torch.
If it can't be fixed with duct tape or cleaned with SB, I'll turn into ashes.
(If you have duct tape, you don't need the other two things.)
************************************************************
Question #3 (This one was a little too high brow for the Polls & Surveys crowd.)
From the tidbits you pick up from watching the news once a week, you decide that the government sucks and that it's about time for nice little coup. And hey, what the heck, you might as well head it up. After a long period of time you amass enough followers to do the deed and march on the capital. It is here you realize that you've overlooked a small detail. You have no weapons. None. Not even a pitchfork. But you've come this far, so there's no turning back. How do you successfully overthrow the government without using force?
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Yahoo! Answers:
Why would you want to overthrough the government why dont you just sit back and put up ith it like everybody else?
(Because the guy on CNN told me I didn't have to.)
Call myself a government then give them a bunch of ununderstandable, multifunctional, large worded blabber that they would not understand but look stupid if the hinted so, on tv.
(When you start with the large worded blabber, make sure and throw in 'ununderstandable'. That's a good one.)
sometimes, i see ghosts
(I would be willing to wager that at any given time at least 5% of the people answering questions on Yahoo are under the influence of either alcohol or some recreational drug.)
well if i've "amassed enough followers" as you so wonderfully put, I wonuldn't NEED weapons- I would get myself into a high enough postion in the government until I could throw it from the inside out. Ever heard of Hitler? Yeah, basically that's what he did got enough followers until HIS way became THE way. i guess in order to do that you'd have had to have had this plan form the beginning unless you want years of more work... a better question is how did you manage to forget that you might need weapons? and why would you not have any weapons? those might also be important in answering this situation.
********************************************************
Question #4 (I know, I originally said that I wasn't going to post this. But I think it needs to be seen, especially considering the additional positive remark that was added late.)
What do you think of these songs?
it sucks
(Yes, a bit of a scathing remark to start, but then...)
Utter brilliance!!
LOL thats so cute!!
love it.
why do you wanna know?
(Why do you want to know why I want to know? Yeah.)
no
GAY
*********************************************************
Question # 1 (You have to make a living somehow...)
You've been laid off and are desperately seeking employment. After much searching, you realize your options are pretty limited, and settle on the only thing available that fits your particular set of skills: professional wrestler. What is your wrestler name and what does your costume look like?
------------------------------------------------------------------
Yahoo! Answers
haha good question but im not creative :)
(I posted this twice and this was the only response I got the first time. I'd say it was a waste of my time, but that's pretty much the essence of this whole experiment.)
Mr. Italiano
I would have a cape that looks like the Italian flag. And My Green suit would have a Italian Style tie with a red and white shorts.
The black Axe
and my costume wld b a pair of ED Hardy Jeans wit a axe and blood spray painted
im not a fan of tight pants
************************************************************
Question # 2 (I still had Batman on the brain.)
What would you carry in a your utility belt?
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Yahoo! Answers:
I think so
(Good work. I mean, really, you've gotta love when they put so much thought into it.)
Duct tape, a can of Scrubby Bubbles and an acetylene torch.
If it can't be fixed with duct tape or cleaned with SB, I'll turn into ashes.
(If you have duct tape, you don't need the other two things.)
************************************************************
Question #3 (This one was a little too high brow for the Polls & Surveys crowd.)
From the tidbits you pick up from watching the news once a week, you decide that the government sucks and that it's about time for nice little coup. And hey, what the heck, you might as well head it up. After a long period of time you amass enough followers to do the deed and march on the capital. It is here you realize that you've overlooked a small detail. You have no weapons. None. Not even a pitchfork. But you've come this far, so there's no turning back. How do you successfully overthrow the government without using force?
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Yahoo! Answers:
Why would you want to overthrough the government why dont you just sit back and put up ith it like everybody else?
(Because the guy on CNN told me I didn't have to.)
Call myself a government then give them a bunch of ununderstandable, multifunctional, large worded blabber that they would not understand but look stupid if the hinted so, on tv.
(When you start with the large worded blabber, make sure and throw in 'ununderstandable'. That's a good one.)
sometimes, i see ghosts
(I would be willing to wager that at any given time at least 5% of the people answering questions on Yahoo are under the influence of either alcohol or some recreational drug.)
well if i've "amassed enough followers" as you so wonderfully put, I wonuldn't NEED weapons- I would get myself into a high enough postion in the government until I could throw it from the inside out. Ever heard of Hitler? Yeah, basically that's what he did got enough followers until HIS way became THE way. i guess in order to do that you'd have had to have had this plan form the beginning unless you want years of more work... a better question is how did you manage to forget that you might need weapons? and why would you not have any weapons? those might also be important in answering this situation.
********************************************************
Question #4 (I know, I originally said that I wasn't going to post this. But I think it needs to be seen, especially considering the additional positive remark that was added late.)
What do you think of these songs?
it sucks
(Yes, a bit of a scathing remark to start, but then...)
Utter brilliance!!
LOL thats so cute!!
love it.
why do you wanna know?
(Why do you want to know why I want to know? Yeah.)
no
GAY
Sunday, July 5, 2009
July 6: Unfortuanely, it's only a one way trip.
You have a hankering for some calories, so you head to McDonald's for 6 double cheese burgers. They're having one of those fun scratch off games, so you get a large Coke (diet, of course). After your meal you do some scratching and realize you've won. Your prize, an all expenses paid trip to the moon. What fun moon things will you do while you're up there?
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Yahoo! Answers:
walk
jump on a trampoline
bring some crackers and devour it. (swiss cheese..)
(The moon is provolone, stupid.)
It would be awesome to have praise and worship exalting God on the moon :D
moon earth?
lolz no i would go on a moon bounce and see if they work in space :D
do it on the moon
(Do what? Do you know what he's talking about? Uh huh... no, no way. That's ridiculous.)
planting!
I would bring a friend and populate the moon! And when we controlled the universe, I would eat some cheese. :)
Haha, interesting question.
Here's a star, to go with your moon.
(A very, very close friend, apparently.)
Alright, first things first I would scoop up some cheese and eat it there. Second, I would have to run all around til I fall in a crater. Next, I would play hide and seek with the aliens and hide in the crater. Ooo then I would scream as much as I could until someone slaps me for being so dang annoying! Well, I guess I would like to do some exploring/observing and get some of the rocks and such to observe when I get home, or I can sell them....either way. And by the end of the day I would scoop up all the cheese there and bring it with me!!! Haha lol
Yeah McDonalds would so have that type of prize! lol
Oh maybe i should smuggle someone so that we can play hide and go seek together with the aliens!
(I would like to volunteer to be the person who slaps you.)
i would moonwalk on the moon :)
Well, first off I need to know what kind of cheese the moon is made of - then I'll have a better answer.
and btw, I would of course ask the Man in the Moon to supper *__*.
I would definitely jump around singing walking on the moon by the police I don't think it could get much better
Giant steps are what you take, walking on the moon!
(I know how it could get better. You could sing a song that doesn't suck.)
Grafffiti!
The Moon Walk of course!
look at rocks?
(Yay!)
shoot a huge nuke at earth
(I see a very small flaw in your plan...)
hop around like an idiot
I would moon the earth. But then hurry home for another double cheese burger. Mmmmm.
Reported for the violation of community guidelines.
(Sweet! This is my goal now. I figure if I haven't violated the community guideline, the question isn't good enough. What do I care? I have more Yahoo accounts than I know what to do with now.)
Impossible. I'd never go to McDonalds.
(That'll make it hard to sue them later on in life when you put on some pounds.)
find some nummy moon cheese and make a lovely sandwich
dance, sing, float, make love to a rock .
yenno, normal things like that .
(I have so many things I would like to say here, but not one of them is in any way appropriate.)
i'd collect as much cheese as i could.
I'd probably be too sick puking up my six double cheeseburgers to do any fun moon things...
I would tan. Because EVERYONE tans on the moon.
uhh...im too high to understand.
(Don't worry. You probably wouldn't have gotten it anyway.)
I'll bring a lap top......
X3
that's how much i love the computer >.<>.>
runnn
I would take a ---- in a crater then scribble IF.UI Gallieo in my urine
Afterwards it was Mcdonalds!
I would bring my all expenses paid McDonalds meal up to the moon with me (because my moon trip is of course, completely decked out in McDonald's gear), and eat the french fries by throwing them in the air, then leaping to catch them in my mouth. However, this would be a problem, as I would be wearing a space suit on the normal earth moon. So the moon in my fantasy has air. It's like earth with less gravity.
Yes, I do have ADD... got a problem?
Thank you for allowing me to rant. Good question!
(No, no... thank YOU.)
sex on the moon!!!!!!!!!! no im kidding, id jump up nd do a bunch of flips nd tricks nd stuff like u do on those bungee jumpy thingys lolz idk
(I will ignore the first part of your answer and skip straight to the issue here: How much time do you actually save by leaving the 'a' out of the word 'and' while taking the time to type out complex, high level words such as 'thingys'?)
...huh?
Well initially politeness would dictate that I ask the local inhabitants permission just to be there, I don't mean Americans. Then I would look at all the buildings and ask where does Bert Newton live.
(According to Wikipedia, he's an old Australian actor who's nickname was 'Moonface'. He also won a Golden Logie, whatever that is.)
hmmm first play 360 FIRST EVER CONSOLE IN SPACE after that probably go play soccer and juggle forever which would be awesome. then go meet the moon aliens try their native foods, kick their butts in soccer due to their lack of cordination and come back with my new space friend whos name cannot be typed.
First of all I would play some basket ball then dress up as superman then pretend to fly and do back flips and stuff like that
(So basically the same thing you do every day, then?)
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Yahoo! Answers:
walk
jump on a trampoline
bring some crackers and devour it. (swiss cheese..)
(The moon is provolone, stupid.)
It would be awesome to have praise and worship exalting God on the moon :D
moon earth?
lolz no i would go on a moon bounce and see if they work in space :D
do it on the moon
(Do what? Do you know what he's talking about? Uh huh... no, no way. That's ridiculous.)
planting!
I would bring a friend and populate the moon! And when we controlled the universe, I would eat some cheese. :)
Haha, interesting question.
Here's a star, to go with your moon.
(A very, very close friend, apparently.)
Alright, first things first I would scoop up some cheese and eat it there. Second, I would have to run all around til I fall in a crater. Next, I would play hide and seek with the aliens and hide in the crater. Ooo then I would scream as much as I could until someone slaps me for being so dang annoying! Well, I guess I would like to do some exploring/observing and get some of the rocks and such to observe when I get home, or I can sell them....either way. And by the end of the day I would scoop up all the cheese there and bring it with me!!! Haha lol
Yeah McDonalds would so have that type of prize! lol
Oh maybe i should smuggle someone so that we can play hide and go seek together with the aliens!
(I would like to volunteer to be the person who slaps you.)
i would moonwalk on the moon :)
Well, first off I need to know what kind of cheese the moon is made of - then I'll have a better answer.
and btw, I would of course ask the Man in the Moon to supper *__*.
I would definitely jump around singing walking on the moon by the police I don't think it could get much better
Giant steps are what you take, walking on the moon!
(I know how it could get better. You could sing a song that doesn't suck.)
Grafffiti!
The Moon Walk of course!
look at rocks?
(Yay!)
shoot a huge nuke at earth
(I see a very small flaw in your plan...)
hop around like an idiot
I would moon the earth. But then hurry home for another double cheese burger. Mmmmm.
Reported for the violation of community guidelines.
(Sweet! This is my goal now. I figure if I haven't violated the community guideline, the question isn't good enough. What do I care? I have more Yahoo accounts than I know what to do with now.)
Impossible. I'd never go to McDonalds.
(That'll make it hard to sue them later on in life when you put on some pounds.)
find some nummy moon cheese and make a lovely sandwich
dance, sing, float, make love to a rock .
yenno, normal things like that .
(I have so many things I would like to say here, but not one of them is in any way appropriate.)
i'd collect as much cheese as i could.
I'd probably be too sick puking up my six double cheeseburgers to do any fun moon things...
I would tan. Because EVERYONE tans on the moon.
uhh...im too high to understand.
(Don't worry. You probably wouldn't have gotten it anyway.)
I'll bring a lap top......
X3
that's how much i love the computer >.<>.>
runnn
I would take a ---- in a crater then scribble IF.UI Gallieo in my urine
Afterwards it was Mcdonalds!
I would bring my all expenses paid McDonalds meal up to the moon with me (because my moon trip is of course, completely decked out in McDonald's gear), and eat the french fries by throwing them in the air, then leaping to catch them in my mouth. However, this would be a problem, as I would be wearing a space suit on the normal earth moon. So the moon in my fantasy has air. It's like earth with less gravity.
Yes, I do have ADD... got a problem?
Thank you for allowing me to rant. Good question!
(No, no... thank YOU.)
sex on the moon!!!!!!!!!! no im kidding, id jump up nd do a bunch of flips nd tricks nd stuff like u do on those bungee jumpy thingys lolz idk
(I will ignore the first part of your answer and skip straight to the issue here: How much time do you actually save by leaving the 'a' out of the word 'and' while taking the time to type out complex, high level words such as 'thingys'?)
...huh?
Well initially politeness would dictate that I ask the local inhabitants permission just to be there, I don't mean Americans. Then I would look at all the buildings and ask where does Bert Newton live.
(According to Wikipedia, he's an old Australian actor who's nickname was 'Moonface'. He also won a Golden Logie, whatever that is.)
hmmm first play 360 FIRST EVER CONSOLE IN SPACE after that probably go play soccer and juggle forever which would be awesome. then go meet the moon aliens try their native foods, kick their butts in soccer due to their lack of cordination and come back with my new space friend whos name cannot be typed.
First of all I would play some basket ball then dress up as superman then pretend to fly and do back flips and stuff like that
(So basically the same thing you do every day, then?)
Wednesday, July 1, 2009
July 2: *Theme from The Natural*
I'm back from Game #2 (another very exciting win for your Texas Rangers). Here's some happy thoughts:
- I. LOVE. BASEBALL.
(You knew I had to work it in somehow. Why beat around the bush?)
- In the world of television, there has never been a show quite like the original Batman TV series (you know, before Adam West became the mayor of Quohog). The Batman series originating in 1966 really is an enigma. On one hand, you examine the overall quality. The dialogue is awkward, a lot of the acting is terrible, and the show was canceled after three years because Fox wanted to cut some characters and the Batman people didn't like it. Oh, and Robin may be the single most annoying character in the superhero world. That being said, that show is incredible. It is inexplicably entertaining. At first I thought it was just me and my great liking for Batman. Then I dug a little deeper and found out that it actually won an Emmy back in the day. How can you not like it? The overly dramatic narration, the Bang!, Ka-pow!, and Biff! screens that come up during fights, and let us not forget the theme song, which is an enigma in its own right:
That may be the single most poorly written theme song in the history of TV. But once you hear it, you're singing it for the rest of the day. You're either walking around going "Batman...Batman...Batman" or (more likely) "Duh-nuh-na-nuh-nuh-nuh-na-nuh". That doesn't even make any sense when it's typed out, but if you've watched that clip up there you know exactly what I'm talking about, and by the time you read these words have probably already sung it through at least twice.
- If one is looking to hire security guards for his or her establishment or venue, the applicants should be required to both run a certain distance in a certain amount of time and be put through extensive agility drills. I only say this because at the game tonight, when the Rangers won on a walk-off home run in the bottom of the ninth (Woohoo!), a fan who was no doubt at least slightly intoxicated hopped onto the field and took some victory laps. There were four security guards after him, and he made them look like fools. They tried to surround him, corner him, and run him down, and I'm pretty sure three of the four ended up on the turf. This guy had some mad skills. He was juking right, juking left, hopping over the reach of diving guards, all while waving his hands about and playing to the crowd. We were all cheering for him in our euphoric state. The only reason they caught him was that he gave himself up so he could high five some other members of the crowd. So, if you're looking for security guards, check the resumes for speed and agility. And maybe form tackling.
Eh, that's about it. I think I'll sign off in 1966 Batman style:
(Overly dramatic narrator voice)
Is this all SQotD has to offer?
Will there be a question tomorrow?
Why does he keep ranting about how awesome Batman is?
Tune in tomorrow, same bat time, same bat channel.
And remember, the worst is yet to come!
- I. LOVE. BASEBALL.
(You knew I had to work it in somehow. Why beat around the bush?)
- In the world of television, there has never been a show quite like the original Batman TV series (you know, before Adam West became the mayor of Quohog). The Batman series originating in 1966 really is an enigma. On one hand, you examine the overall quality. The dialogue is awkward, a lot of the acting is terrible, and the show was canceled after three years because Fox wanted to cut some characters and the Batman people didn't like it. Oh, and Robin may be the single most annoying character in the superhero world. That being said, that show is incredible. It is inexplicably entertaining. At first I thought it was just me and my great liking for Batman. Then I dug a little deeper and found out that it actually won an Emmy back in the day. How can you not like it? The overly dramatic narration, the Bang!, Ka-pow!, and Biff! screens that come up during fights, and let us not forget the theme song, which is an enigma in its own right:
That may be the single most poorly written theme song in the history of TV. But once you hear it, you're singing it for the rest of the day. You're either walking around going "Batman...Batman...Batman" or (more likely) "Duh-nuh-na-nuh-nuh-nuh-na-nuh". That doesn't even make any sense when it's typed out, but if you've watched that clip up there you know exactly what I'm talking about, and by the time you read these words have probably already sung it through at least twice.
- If one is looking to hire security guards for his or her establishment or venue, the applicants should be required to both run a certain distance in a certain amount of time and be put through extensive agility drills. I only say this because at the game tonight, when the Rangers won on a walk-off home run in the bottom of the ninth (Woohoo!), a fan who was no doubt at least slightly intoxicated hopped onto the field and took some victory laps. There were four security guards after him, and he made them look like fools. They tried to surround him, corner him, and run him down, and I'm pretty sure three of the four ended up on the turf. This guy had some mad skills. He was juking right, juking left, hopping over the reach of diving guards, all while waving his hands about and playing to the crowd. We were all cheering for him in our euphoric state. The only reason they caught him was that he gave himself up so he could high five some other members of the crowd. So, if you're looking for security guards, check the resumes for speed and agility. And maybe form tackling.
Eh, that's about it. I think I'll sign off in 1966 Batman style:
(Overly dramatic narrator voice)
Is this all SQotD has to offer?
Will there be a question tomorrow?
Why does he keep ranting about how awesome Batman is?
Tune in tomorrow, same bat time, same bat channel.
And remember, the worst is yet to come!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)