Don't ask me why the crocodile's there. I don't know.

You are the newest jester in the king's court. It's not really a position you wanted, but through a combination of too much credit card debt and some bad luck, here you are. Here's the problem: the king wants to laugh, but he's tired of the standard joke teller. The last guy was a stand-up jester and he was fed to a wild boar. So you have to take a different approach, but you haven't decided what it would be when you find yourself in front of the king. Looking around you see a deck of cards, a blow dryer, and an untrained crocodile on a leash. You don't have to use these things, but they are there. How do you make the king laugh and escape a horrible death?

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Yahoo! Answers:

[The first answer is the guy who posted the Potter Puppet Pals link. I know, I said you wouldn't see this question, but I had a change of heart brought on mainly by a lack of creativity and the desire to go to bed.]

Point a gun to his head and say "Laugh you sonofa----- or else I'll fa king shoot!"
(I almost didn't even include this one, but his clever use of the word 'king' was too good to pass up.)

[Do something obscene] and dance.
(I don't think you want to know what it was.)

I have no idea.
(You are a waste of precious oxygen.)

i will i think use all these things. i will blow the cards one by one into the crocodile's mouth, with a bad aim at it . the king will laugh seeing the crocodile running after each card and missing some and eating some. i will also make it a game of it by asking the courtiers to count how many cards went into the crocodile's mouth. i hope the king will laugh at this
(Wild boar attack!)

Haha hop into the croc's mouth! its a lot better then the 'horrible death' the king would bring to me right? and the king would either save me or watch and either way he laughs!
Everyone enjoys my pain.

*sweating*
Knock knock
*kings bored voice*: Whos there?
Lettuce
king: lettuce who (*bored voice*)
Lettuce in, were cold out h-here...he he ha ha ha ha!
...
ARGHGHHA! OMG! THE PAIN! ARGH! THE PPAAAINN!
(I'm glad you've accepted your fate.)

i would blow the dryer in the croc's face, to make him blind.... then, i would make him pick a card.

Throw The Blow Dryer At The Crocodile Really Hard Then Throw The Cards Above My Head So They Go Everywhere And Laugh. XD
(Why Do You Feel The Need To Capitalize Every Word?)

Crap I'm no joker so I'd probably get fed to the gator!
(You get fed to the boar. Geez... pay attention.)

I'd fight the crocodile like in this fight scene.



(That was one of the most incredible things I've ever seen.)

Feed someone to the croc and say "crikey, he's a hungry lil bugger!"

is the king ticklish?